i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
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