The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
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You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
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he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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