i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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