I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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