Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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