My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize