Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vagina is talking i cant
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
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