another moral hangover. fuck.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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