i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
