i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
