That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
