I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
