ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Do vagina's smell?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
