i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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