Kiss
Puke
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
