I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
