Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
