I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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