Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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