Don't you send me to vm
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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