At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Come share oat with me in your robe
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Randomize
