How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
