Grow some girl-balls and come out already
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
