when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
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Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
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Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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