guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
