Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I have post one night stand depression
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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