So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
