Sry I called you an 8
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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