goodnight i made you a song goodbye
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Randomize
