i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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