Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
