Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Randomize
