Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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