i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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