Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
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