suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
