PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
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Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
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So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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