My nipple is on Facebook.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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