Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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