clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I think a kid would responsible me up
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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