i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Randomize
