Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My friends, they love my intelligence
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Randomize
