NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
