You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
