i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Randomize
