Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
