i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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