There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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