She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
