Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
